I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what the next year or so of my life is going to look like. Taking this contract has been a nice change because it allows me to really only have to think about the next 12 weeks which feels more easier to manage than the next 12 months.
I know around November it will be time to start looking for more work. My current manager has asked me to extend but I told her no. I don’t really want to tie myself down to this current place any longer than I need to. It’s not a bad place to work, but I’ve come to value the feeling of freedom I have being a temporarily contracted worker.
It’s kind of funny. When I moved to Colorado, I was looking forward to being set on one specific path. I had the future of my relationship that I was looking forward to and I was happy with the permanence of everything that came along with that. But since that part of my life ended, I really don’t want to feel stuck somewhere long-term. Except that comes with the uneasy feeling of not really being sure what is next.
It’s the paradox of choice. I can do whatever I want, but what do I want? And that’s the part I haven’t really come up with yet. I’m not searching for the perfect solution. But I do want to be happy. And I think that’s a really big part of wanting to be patient deciding what I do next.
I work a night shift tonight. Then I have some days off until the weekend. I have plans to grab drinks with someone tomorrow, and camping later in the week which I completely forgot I committed to months ago. But it will be good for me to go. So I can create more memories and experiences outside of my own hobbies. I just hope we don’t get rained on the whole time.
Otherwise I’m feeling okay. With my new work schedule I think it’s time to settle in to a fall/winter routine and really dial myself in for the new year when the spring comes around again.
To quote one of my favorite music artists Danial Caesar, “Try your best to keep composure, don’t give up all of your smiles”.
Thanks for reading.
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